Thoughful confession

I knew there was something about her from the very first moment I saw her. I knew I am falling for her from the very first moment my eyes set on her. I could say from the memories that I was actually in love with her. Something that makes me wondered if the phrase “love at first sight” indeed works in the same way. It had been almost an year when I first saw her at the local market. Ananya and I were there at a local shop browsing through some music CD’s when she entered. Her perfectly tied pony tail, the grey tank top, blue denims and her glasses with a thick black rectangular frame still serves as a fantasy thought for me. I just couldn’t let go of that appearance from my sight. The way she chewed her gum, the way she expressed her impatience at the shop owner’s lethargy. That attitude and confidence on her face shining within her fair skin.

From the very first moment I realised that she isn’t one of the locals. I knew there was no chance that she could be a native. The way she threw her disgust when the shop owner accidently ignored her and the way she looked at him raising one of her thin eye-brows from behind those specs gave a clear evidence of all that I was assuming. She hailed from Uttrakhand. A girl from the mountains. She had a last name associated with mountain people. I knew the reason behind that serenity on her face and those dark eyes now.

From the very first moment I knew I couldn’t be with her. There was not a trivial doubt about it. I was totally out of her league. There she was a pretty dental student against a guy from a private engineering college. I knew I can never approach her. Plus she was 2 years older than me. I had learned she already was dating somebody else. But even if she was single she would never even care to even put a glance at me.

I was never a guy with great facial characters, neither I had a muscular build, nor I was famous. I was just another face in the crowd, I had an average build and I kept to myself most of the time. I enjoyed my solitary, my laptop and my compact friends circle. i never escaped the realms of rock and metal while she had a thing for soft romantic genre. I watched The Walking Dead and Sherlock while she admired Grey's Anatomy. I was a science fiction geek and always into dark comics while she adorned Disney. The thought of dating her was almost as revolting and absurd as considering oneself to be Robert Plant when you first hold a guitar.

Today I saw her again at the Central. I was with Viraaj. While he was still going through heaps of options to gift his girlfriend I was there standing against the wooden rails observing everything else. I had just turned back when my eyes caught a familiar sight and all those flashbacks from the past sprinted in front of me within a flash. There she was walking past me, in her olive green top and denims. She was wearing the same thick frame black rectangular specs. I kept looking at her awestruck by the chain of events I was witnessing until she finally vanished behind the racks of clothes. The next thing I remember was I had the phone in my hand, eagerly waiting to inform Ananya about this unexpected encounter. He cried at the top of his lungs and double-checked my words. Something had triggered an impulse within him and he told me that he will be finally dropping a mail to her.

I knew he could charm her. He possessed every bit of it and had every trait that could caught her attention which would have otherwise gone absolutely ignored if it had been me. I was cherished by the sight of her face. That dull and monotonous evening would end in a startling view, was never anticipated.

And as I made my way out of the Central, I turned around hoping to see her for one last time before I leave. She was nowhere to be seen. I was upset. Somewhere deep in my heart i was in love with this girl but some part of me was aware that i can never tell her. Logic and Reality were now rendering my thoughts in deep confusion.

I kicked the empty soda can in my way and  looked into the sky. A shooting star streaked right in front of me in that winter night. I took it as a good luck sign and headed back towards home.